Good afternoon esteemed members of the press,
The Kennedy Administration is ecstatic to announce a huge step forward in world peace. We have had a breakthrough in negotiations with the Union of Soviet Socialist Republics in that they have agreed to remove their nuclear missiles from Cuba in exchange for the United States removing their nuclear missiles from Turkey. Therefore we are delighted to inform the American people that they can sleep well at night with there no longer being an enemy nuclear power 103 miles away from the American mainland.
Delightfully,
The Kennedy Administration